Well folks, this image proved that beyond a shadow of a slight reasonable doubt that "The Cat" was responsible for the JFK assassination.

Already he/she has been cluttering our inboxes with coupons we don't need or want, now he is behind the most heinous crime of the last century. I wouldn't be surprised to hear that John Wilks Booth had a cat.

If you've ever seen an Oliver Stone picture you know that the someone is up to something somewhere and someone has to be protecting this cat. The Questionable Man is indeed a formatable foe, however, he seems to be spending an inordinate amount of time at fundraisers for various secondary colors and eating all the steaks. This plays right into our hands.

Perhaps we need to fight fire with fire once and for all...

I have enlisted into service the help of a heavy hitter by the name of Cutter Jowls. Jowls recently returned from a recreational journey to Calcutta which ended up as a fight for his life after being shanghaied into indentured servitude in the underground rickshaw runner game.

Needless to say friends, he found his way out of there and somewhere along the line made and lost a small fortune in antique cutlery.

This is just the sort of nefarious character we need on our side. As payment I have promised all the Bacon and Snasages we can find.

Gods speed Cutter Jowls, you'll need it!